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Poems
From Songs to a Watchful Lover by Donna Hardy
Poems: 61 | 62 | 63 | 64 | 65 | 66 | 67 | 68 | 69 | 70 71 | 72 | 73 | 74 | 75 | 76 | 77 | 78 | 79 | 80
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Return, we beseech thee . . . look down from heaven and behold and visit this vine.
It was your idea, Love, the vineyard. You cleared the land, planted vines, built fences, laid out water lines. Then
you turned away. I haven't seen you since. The fence is down, goats nibble the tendrils that run helter-skelter
across dry ground. Neighbors complain, fear the neglect, insects. I don't know what to do. I wait, scan the horizon,
hoping to see your form, your face, you coming to restore your dream. My dream.
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How long, Lord. Wilt thou be angry forever?
Your fiery wrath blisters my heart. Your jealousy paralyzes me. Believe me, Love. I am not your enemy.
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. . . and had rained down manna upon them to eat, and had given them of the corn of heaven.
You saved my life, Love; brought me from bondage, all but parted the seas so I could be free. But the expanse of it frightened me. I would have returned to the dark familiar.
You found me food, drink, a place to sleep; you called off invaders. Still I never trusted tomorrow. I cried and complained until you finally left me there. Who could blame you?
I descended so fast. Every cell of me sore. Vermin moved in. Now there was no food, no drink, no comfort. I dreaded
your return, your anger. But you came and showed only your unending affection. This time I will remember how it is to be loved.
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I call to remembrance my song in the night
All night I lay in despair, tormented by your absence, not daring to call, lest you not answer, fearing you gone forever.
I remember the storm, the river, savage waters carrying me, my terror, thinking I had lost you. Suddenly your strong arm gripping mine,
your power, Love, holding me. At dawn I slept.
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Thou didst cause judgment to be heard from heaven; the earth feared and was still.
I would be strong, Love, but when I see how you level the powerful, I hold to my weakness, as the child who half sleeps in the back seat while those in front talk softly along night roads.
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. . . in the hand of the Lord there is a cup and the wine is red . . . but the dregs thereof all the wicked of the earth shall drink
Then you poured rich wine, filled my glass with hint of raspberry, plum, oak, a finish like a soft evening by the lake.
Now I drink the dregs. Every foolish vain act I've done runs like ticker tape across the screen of my mind.
I know you could pull this house down and leave me in the rubble. I must change my life.
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Oh, God, why hast thou cast us off . . . ?
You stretched each day before me as a weaver laying out a bolt of fine cloth, peach, mauve, & gold; you gathered the night around me midnight blue and kept the beasts at bay.
My sun, my moon, my fire, where have you gone?
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"They have set their mouth against the heavens, and their tongue walketh through the earth."
"Come with us," they said. They flew me to exotic cities, fed me from vast plates in intimate restaurants, lured me with fine wine, baited me with the promise of power, a bright future filled with glamour, excitement, prominence, wealth. I was tempted, Love. But when I saw how far from you they live, how far from you this was taking me, I came home.
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The mountains shall bring peace to the people, and the little hills . . .
There is so much to be done, Love, so many people to be sheltered, fed, saved from violence, from death in the wrong season.
I will begin here: this one hungry child, this one old woman who asks for days of warm sunshine, for nights of gentle rain.
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Let my mouth be filled with thy praise.
I have known you all my life, have called to you again and again. Each time you have come. I have put you to the test as you have tested me. Who now can tell your story better than I?
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Make haste, O God, to deliver me; make haste to help me, O Lord.
Call me, Love, as soon as you get this message. I'm being pushed from all sides. Bulldozed. Flattened. I need to hear from you.
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Save me, O God . . . I sink in deep mire
I am swept away, desperate for something to grab onto, some one, some place. I
can't get a foothold here. I flounder, flail. It's over my head. I can't get out. I've made
a mess of it. Oh, Love, I pray no one find my foolishness a reflection on you. But
can you come one more time? Set me on my feet? Hold me as I find some ground?
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Blessed be the Lord who daily loadeth us with benefits.
I am orphaned, hungry, frightened; abandoned by all but these demons who hover just out of sight, murmur menace day & night. Then you come.
Stems of leeks lean out of the sack you carry. You enter without knocking, set the brown paper bag on the counter. You have brought bread.
You turn on music, wash, slice, chop leeks, potatoes, toss them into the soup pot. You light the fire. My demons flee like smoke in the wind. My fears melt in the warmth of your love.
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God be merciful unto us . . . and cause his face to shine upon us
My friends know of your faithful evenhanded regard for me.
Better yet is when I feel you looking at me, loving me.
I keep it to myself.
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Come and see the works of God
I swear, Love, you could dry up the sea were you to set your face against it; then fill it again in a minute with your tears of compassion. I would do anything for you.
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…we shall be satisfied with the goodness of thy house…
I love this house. Everywhere the presence of you. I remember you pouring the foundation, leaving spaces where ground water might drain.
I watched when you fastened the plates, formed the structure from rows of clean, dry boards stacked in cubes on a platform you had built. You measured everything,
drilled holes precisely where the power would come in, where light and warmth would enter, that I might cook meals and gather friends around a table where
my first thought is always of you and the treasure you have given me.
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Hear my voice, O God . . . preserve my life from fear of the enemy.
They gather daily, this malicious bunch of nay-sayers with their snake tongues.
They tell me of my every flaw, shoot poison-tipped arrows through my heart, send depth charges through my belly.
Tell me again, Love, about you and me, about our life together.
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…my soul thirsteth for
thee…
I rise early, scan the desert sky. There will be no rain. Only from your bounty, Love, will I be sustained this day. I am yours for as long as I live.
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… unto thee, O Lord, belongeth mercy…
I have within me a faithless faction who doubts my every thought, would thwart my every creative effort. I need your help, Love. Soon.
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From the end of the earth will I cry unto thee…
Love, you are the rock around which I sow the field in spring; around which, in the autumn, I plant my winter garden.
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